Skate Names

In roller derby, most skaters have cool skate names -- if you've seen "Whip It," you're familiar with the concept. Some of the names in the movie include Smashley Simpson, Eva Destruction, Babe Ruthless, and so on. One of my favorite derby names that I've heard is Sandra Day O'Clobber. :-)

Derby names have to be unique -- there's a national registry, and if your desired name is the same as or even too similar to another skater's name, you can't use it.

That's too bad, because my first (and, I still think, best) idea for my own skate name was "Auntie Maim." No dice -- there's already a skater named "Annie Maim" and it's too similar.

Some of the other names Charlie and I thought up -- which are all already taken -- include Sara Whalin', Killary Clinton, Penny Pain and Punky Bruiser.

The names I am now considering, which don't appear to be taken:

- Queen of the Harpies

- Harriet Half-Nelson

I'll probably think of more before the time comes that I actually need one. :-)

Also, if any African-American derby girl out there needs a name, may I suggest "Michelle OSlamma"? It's not taken.